I'm sick of defending who I'm not

Footsteps in the wrong direction 

Claiming my identity

Hide my face from your expression 

While the world takes hold of me

I'm sick of pretending 

This is who I am

I'm sick of defending

Who I am not

Guide my feet 

Let my eyes see only you

Take my heart

I'm falling back on you

Consequences for my defeat 

Unmasking the one who used to be  

Now the world sees "the real me"

My creator sees "authentic beauty"

I came across this the other day.  I wrote this at a very trying time in my life.  I didn't know who I really wanted to be.  My convictions were running my life, literally.  I was such a defensive person, and I thought I was defending what I believed in, but I was really covering up my guilt and convictions.  This is just a little piece of what I've fought through and what I have overcome.  I know that I'm not even close to being who God wants me to be, but I'm a work in progress.  

I want to encourage you today, to let God lead.  It's scary, and usually not where you feel like you want to be, but once you're in it...you won't want to leave.  For me it meant making some changes and realizing the world didn't revolve around Jody!  I was completely humbled!  Trust me to whoever is reading, it isn't always going to be easy, but it's worth it!  People will see your different, your actions will speak for themselves!  My defensiveness usually came from being "preached at", you shouldn't wear that, you shouldn't do that, you shouldn't be there...but once you let God lead your life, you'll know what to do!